Always Mine (Coming Home To The Grove Book 1) Read online
Page 2
“I’m so glad you’re home, Lacy,” I tell her with emotion filling my voice. I never dreamed this time would come, and I’m determined to make the best of the opportunity.
She tilts her head to the side as if weighing my words. “Why? Is there something you need to say that you didn’t already say when we broke up? Hey, listen, if you’ve got guilt you can let it go because I’m just fine, Trent.”
She’s mad, and that’s a good thing as far as I’m concerned because it means she still has feelings for me.
I already noticed she’s not wearing a ring, which means she’s fair game. If it’s a boyfriend she’s got, she won’t have him for long.
I decide to just tell her, even though she may not want to hear it. “I do have guilt. A lot of it. There’s so much we need to talk about.” Her face is blank, not giving me any indication if what I am saying affects her in any way. “I still have feelings for you.”
I know she’s not open to hear the truth. She doesn’t want to hear that I still love her. That I’ve spent every day for the last three years regretting what I did and wishing I’d figured out a way to give her what she wants but keeping her in my life too. I screwed up royally, and I can’t blame her if she can’t find a way to forgive me. But I’m not going to give up. I’ll just keep trying until she gives in or calls the cops for me harassing her.
From the look on her face, it seems the latter may come true sooner than I figured. She’s definitely not ready to hear all of that.
She crosses her arms over her chest and stares back at me. She’s holding her tongue, still the same disciplined Lacy that I remember. She never did like attention on herself, but she always stood up for herself. I know it’s coming.
When she doesn’t answer me, I continue, “I would like to start over and see where things go.”
4
Lacy
I laugh. I literally laugh out loud, right in his face.
He’s got to be joking! After everything he put me through, he has the gall to stand in front of me and ask to start over?
My laugh sounds angry, and I’m glad it does. I don’t want to fight or argue with him, but surely he needs to know that there is no way we could start over. Not with our past. No way! He broke up with me and ripped my heart in two. Surely he realizes that I’m not that dumb.
Through gritted teeth, I call him out. “You do know that you are the one who broke up with me?”
When he takes a small step toward me, I hold up my hand to stop him. He walks straight into my hand, and the feel of his hard chest underneath my palm feels as if it scalds me, and I jerk it back. “You broke my heart, and if you think I’m dumb enough to waste any more time on you than I already did, then you never thought much of my intelligence.”
“Lacy.” He says my name pleadingly.
But I won’t be swayed. Maybe there’s a part of me that always wished we had stayed together. But even in my wildest imagination, I never dreamed it would actually happen. I can’t trust him. As far as I know I could let him in only for him to pull away from me again. Thanks, but no thanks. “It’s not going to happen, Trent, so you might as well give up while I’m still at least talking to you.”
It may have been years since I’ve seen him, but I can tell when he’s trying to figure something out. He’s going to try another angle. “It’s a small town. I understand that I didn’t handle our breakup well, and I don’t blame you for your anger, but can’t we just be friends at least?”
I am a harder woman than I was when I left. I look him dead in the eye and say, “No. We are not friends.”
With as much dignity as I can muster, I get into my car and drive away, not once looking in the mirror to see if he’s watching me.
I will not cry! I will not cry, I chant to myself over and over. But I no sooner get one block down the street and already the tears are starting to fall.
Trent
I want to stop her, but the hurt in her eyes has me backing off. There’s so much that needs to be said between us, but I realize now is not the time or the place. Maybe it will never be right.
The thought barely registers before I’m pushing it aside. That’s not an option. I’m going to figure this out, one way or another.
I walk over to my ranch truck and sit down, remembering the last time I saw Lacy before tonight.
My parents had passed away, and I had just gotten back from their funeral. From up in the barn loft, I saw Lacy park her car and walk the distance from the house to the barn. I’d never doubted my love for her. I knew even then at the ripe ol’ age of eighteen that I wanted to spend my life with Lacy. But I also knew that our plans were not going to be possible.
Thinking we were going to move to the city and build a life together was going to have to change. I knew I couldn’t leave now. Not with my younger brother and older brother depending on me to help with the ranch. Plus, we were all grieving, all lost in our own ways. I couldn’t desert them now.
But watching Lacy stride across Keller land, I knew I couldn’t hold her back either. It had always been so important to her to get out of this small town. She’d talked about living in the city since we were just young kids. I couldn’t be the one to squash that dream. I had to do something.
She was wearing a skirt and T-shirt with white shoes. Her long brown hair was up in some kind of knot on the top of her head. She always mumbled about how plain she thought she looked. But to me, she was beautiful. She was everything I could ever want.
I heard her boots clomp on the steps and walk across the loft until she sat down beside me. We sat there for the longest time, neither one of us talking, only watching the ranch that had been in my family for a hundred years.
She reached for me, but I pulled away. Man, this was going to hurt. “Lacy, we need to talk.”
She looked at me with pity, knowing I was really struggling right now. She no doubt thought it was because of my parents’ death, which was a big part of it, but what was really hurting was the fact of what I was about to do to her.
“What is it, Trent?” she pushed softly.
There’s no way I could drag it out. Heck, I didn’t even know if I was going to be able to force the words out. “Lacy, uh, we need to break up.”
She sat back like I’d slapped her. She was shocked, almost as much as I was for saying it. “What do you mean, break up?” she asked.
I stood up and walked to the middle of the loft. I couldn’t sit next to her and say everything that needed to be said. “We want different things, Lacy.”
She stood up and walked toward me. “We don’t have to leave, Trent. We can stay here.”
And she would’ve too. She would have given up all her dreams of living in the city to stay here in the small town of Forest Grove. Sure, everything would have been fine for a while. But eventually she would have ended up hating me for it. I couldn’t stand in the way of her dreams, no matter how much I wanted and needed her.
“No, Lacy, it’s more than that. We’ve been together since we were in sixth grade. We’ve never even been on a date with anyone else.” Just muttering the words caused me to have stomach cramps and bile to rise in my throat. I knew there was no one else I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, let alone date. “It’s just better if we go ahead and break up now before we do something we can’t take back.”
I must have been convincing, because tears were already forming in her eyes. “Trent?” she questioned me, her voice filled with confusion and anguish.
But I just shook my head, knowing I was doing the right thing, no matter how hard it was. “It’s over, Lacy.”
She ran then. Ran past me, down the stairs and toward the house to her car. It took everything in me to not chase after her and tell her I’d made a mistake. But I stood strong and spent the rest of the night crying in the barn.
I had been eighteen and thought I was doing the right thing. Now I realized how stupid I was. I could have done something different. I could have found an alternate pla
n. But I didn’t. And now I have to live with it.
But I’m not giving up. She may not be ready to start over, but she was my best friend forever. We were each other’s first loves. We trembled in each other’s arms the first time we made love, experiencing it for the first time together. We shared so many firsts. I have no doubt we can start as friends again. Because I know we are meant to be together.
5
Lacy
I was up most of the night thinking about Trent and what he said. I didn’t even let myself think that getting back together with him is a possibility. No matter how handsome he is, I’m not going to put myself through that again.
It’s a good thing my parents are leaving, because if they hear about my refusing to be friends with Trent Keller, they won’t leave at all. They’d be too worried about me.
Of course, I didn’t think they’d be rushing right out the door either. Early this morning, they were off and on their way to the Bahamas before I was even out of my pajamas.
I dressed in a hurry after looking at the calendar my parents gave me before heading out the door. I’ve got guests arriving in under an hour, and one of the Bs in B&B is breakfast. I didn’t even check the night before, but I’m probably going to have to whip up something really quick.
I’m running down the stairs without a smidge of makeup on when the doorbell rings. I’m sure it’s the guests arriving early, and I open the front door without checking to see who it is first.
“Good morning,” Trent says, smiling at me with a box of donuts in one hand and a cupholder with two coffees in the other. I want to send him away, but I really want the coffee, and the donuts would be great to have to offer to my guests since I won’t have time to prepare anything.
I reach for the coffee, but he holds the cup out of reach. “Accepting the coffee means we’re friends, you know.”
“What about the donuts?” I ask.
“Those too. Come on, give me a chance to make up for hurting you.”
I look at my watch and see that the new guests should be here any minute.
“Friendly acquaintances,” I say in negotiation.
“Friends,” he insists.
“Frenemies,” I counter.
“Best friends.” He grins.
I bite my lip, weighing my choices. The longer I stand here, the less time I have. “Fine, friends.” I take the box of donuts with the logo of Patty Cakes on the top. I love Patty Cakes’ donuts.
He takes a sip of coffee as I start arranging them on a platter. “I talked to Patty. She wanted me to tell you that Carrie’s moving back to town. She should be here next week.”
“Carrie’s moving back?” I ask, surprised.
Carrie is Patty’s niece and was one of my very good friends in high school. I started college as soon as we graduated, but she’s only in her third year. I wonder why she’s coming back. I’ll have to be sure to check in on her.
“Yeah, so I guess life outside of Forest Grove ain’t all it’s cracked up to be, huh?” he comments.
My eyes snap to him, sure that he’s being snide, but all I see is curiosity. I forget sometimes that he had wanted to leave too. “Yeah, it’s not.” I wanted nothing more than to get out of this town, but now that I’m back, I know I’ll never leave again. “I missed it here. I think I liked the idea of the big city more than actually living in it. It was lonely. But I finished my associate’s degree and then took a year off doing odd jobs until Mom and Dad told me they were considering selling this place.” I look around the inside of my spacious house. “I didn’t want that. This was my home growing up. I don’t want to let it go.”
For a second, I forget who I’m talking to. I may have agreed to be friends with him, but I’m not going to get close.
I look past him and see a couple pulling into the parking area. I let out an audible sigh. I’m saved by my arriving guests.
Trent
She is a bit overwhelmed. I could see that through the window before she’d opened the door.
Never underestimate the power of donuts.
I decide it would be a good idea to stick around and see if I can help until she gets her feet under her. I carry in the luggage for the couple and take it to the room they’ve reserved.
“Thank you,” Lacy says to me as I come back down the stairs. It is hard for her to thank me; I can see that too.
“It’s what friends are for, right?”
Lacy nods and laughs, a baffled sound. “What does it matter if we’re friends? I’m sure you have tons of friends.”
“It matters. You matter to me, Lacy.”
“Pickings must be slim around here if you’re resorting to exes, Trent.” She shakes her head at me.
Lacy is stubborn and strong willed, but she always has been, and I know it’ll take time to convince her that I’m not trying to play a game with her emotions.
“We were best friends as soon as we met, Lacy. You were always mine, long before I even understood what that meant. We can’t just throw that all away.” I rub my hand through the scruff of my chin. “Girlfriend or just friend, you’re the kind of person that matters.”
She’s not fazed at all by my reminiscing about the good ol’ days. Instead she answers me with a hand on her hip and her chin jutted out. “Too bad that isn’t how you treated me when we broke up.”
Damn, she’s a stubborn woman.
6
Lacy
He’s a lot smoother than he was when we dated through high school. He always seemed sure of himself, and maybe it’s because we were friends forever that he was so easy to talk to. But now he’s way more confident. Maybe even a little cocky. I know I’m going to have to do something to make sure I don’t fall deeper into the bottomless pit of loving Trent. Being mean to him and trying to hold him at arm’s length isn’t going to last, not with his determination.
Plus, even after what he did to me, I still hate being mean to him. He makes it very hard to hang on to my anger. He’s trying for sure. He’s already put more effort into this than I thought he would. Last night I convinced myself that Trent was only trying to maybe save face for the town or maybe he just didn’t want me to be mad at him. Whatever it was, I thought once I told him there wasn’t a chance, he would give up. But obviously, by the way he showed up here so bright and early this morning, he didn’t believe me when I said there’s no chance for us.
Saved by the doorbell, I leave Trent in the kitchen while I go and answer the front door.
I let in the cute handyman who is there to do some repairs on the house. Mom and Dad had set up to have some repairs done while they were gone, and he couldn’t have shown up at a better time.
He smiles broadly at me. “Hi, I’m Bradley. I’m here”—he looks down at his clipboard—“to fix a banister and the loose boards you have on the back porch.”
“Perfect. I’m Lacy,” I tell him, holding out my hand.
He fumbles around the clipboard and then takes my hand in his. His grip is firm, and I ask him, “So where do you want to start?”
“Uh, the back porch.”
“Great.” I point down the hallway. “Straight that way and the door at the end takes you to the back porch.”
He pulls his tool belt up higher on his waist and starts to go but not before giving me another cheeky grin.
“Let me know if you need anything,” I tell him as he walks away. I consider him for a minute. Maybe he’ll be the distraction I need. I’m going to have to figure out something to keep Trent at bay and let him know that there’s no chance of us rekindling our romance from three years ago.
That ship has sailed.
Trent
I take the grocery list from the clip on the refrigerator and finish my coffee and a donut before walking out to the entryway.
Lacy looks as if she’s deep in thought, and I hate to interrupt her. A creak in the floorboard lets her know I’m standing here, and she looks at me with that same guarded look from earlier.
I stop nex
t to her, wanting to be physically close since I can’t be anything else right now. “I wanted to let you know that the plumber that your mother called owes me a favor and is going to be by to fix a leak in the bathroom in room two today.”
She thanks me, almost grudgingly. We seem to go one step forward and then two steps back. Knowing I can’t leave it like that, I start talking to her about my brothers and the ranch. She may not have liked living in a small town, but she sure did love the ranch.
“So Derrick has pretty much taken over on running the ranch. He’s good at it and seems to know all the ins and outs. Jason is, well, still Jason. They both are glad you’re home and they’d like you to come out to the ranch sometime,” I say.
She looks hesitant, so I end with, “You know, when you’re ready.”
She finally takes the bait and asks about Jason. “Didn’t he graduate this year?”
I can’t resist rolling my eyes. “Yes, thank goodness. We didn’t think we were going to make it. After he invited two dates to prom, he caused quite a stink down at the high school. He’ll be leaving for the Army soon, so I’m sure that’s going to settle him down some.”
We get to talking and laughing, and it isn’t long before she’s gotten that nervous look on her face again, like we are getting along too well. “I, uh, have a lot to do. I’m going to go get some laundry done.”